Neil smiled and pretended to go back to sleep. “You like it.”Īndrew pushed his face to the side so he was looking away from him. Neil wouldn’t describe Andrew Minyard as adorable, but his fluffy morning hair might have qualified that way. In the middle of this realization, Neil felt Andrew stir. He would never ask for more than Andrew was willing to give. He would take what Andrew could give him and Neil knew somehow that it would always be enough. He wanted a lot of things, but he wouldn’t put those expectations on Andrew. He didn’t expect Andrew to fight for him. Neil still stood by what he said to Aaron. He had to trust that Neil wouldn’t hurt him. He had to fight to feel okay with Neil’s weight in the same bed as him. He had to fight every instinct he had to let himself care about Neil. He watched his face and in the peaceful clarity of the morning, Neil had a realization about how hard Andrew was already fighting for him. Neil woke then and looked over at Andrew, surprised and pleased to find him still asleep. He didn’t have to say anything for Neil to understand. Once he did, Andrew guided him to touch the pulse in his neck, the same way he did at the airport all those weeks ago. If I’m worth keeping or of I”m just here because you made a promise and don’t want to back out.”Īndrew reached out and gestured for Neil to take his hand. And I think that place is with you, but I have to know if I mean something to you. He hummed and said, “Do you know what I want?”Īndrew stared out at the skyline, exhaling a stream of smoke.Īndrew turned to him and when it became clear that he wasn’t going to answer, Neil continued, “I want to know I belong somewhere. Neil nodded, his hand resting on the solid concrete next to Andrew’s leg.
Andrew sat near the ledge like always, smoking his cigarette until Neil joined him and took it out of his hands for a quick drag, watching the way Andrew’s eyes followed him.Īndrew scowled. It was him and Andrew on the roof, but the edges of the dream felt hazy. So, naturally, this dream left him…confused. He didn’t succeed, of course, but when he did remember his dreams, they were filled with blood and knives and fear that crept into his waking mind and left him disoriented and shaking off the cold feeling that gripped him. Because he had to be alert immediately upon waking, he tried to survive off as little sleep as possible, napping instead of letting himself fall into a sleep deep enough for dreaming. Neil had never been a particularly heavy sleeper, his body hardwired to wake at a moment’s notice and be ready to leave. becomes a psycho murderer, but listen to the song “Fight for Me” from Heathers The Musical and think about Andreil and cry with me, okay? As a bonus for this: Obviously the parallel goes away after J.D.
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